Mini Skirts are fashion statements, not the definition of freedom of women. 

I have no problem with the praise of mini skirts, but there is something not okay with trying to attribute women’s progress, success, and most importantly – FREEDOM to it. And putting down other attires which women have worn with great pride and  ease since generations. 

Writer Shinie Antony has written a tribute to the inventor of mini skirts, the late Mary Quant, she writes “Before Mary Quant struck at hemlines with surgical precision, no one knew that women had legs. At least two of the four female limbs had been a matter of conjecture and wishful thinking, covered as they were in billowing gowns, or sari and salwar in India. With one snip of British designer Mary’s scissors in 1964, the mini was born, which made the midi and maxi hide in closets, ashamed of their garrulous length and breadth.”

Her writing makes it sound as if women had no existence till their BARE LEGS from below the thighs were seen through the invention of the mini Skirt, and for the Indian woman her misfortune was caused by the time-tested, forever loved, magnificently and incomparably beautiful attires like sarees, and salwars; simply because they covered our legs!!

She mentions that “For girls barred from wearing short dresses as adults, the memory of childhood frocks brings to them the nostalgia of running unhindered, jumping, climbing trees and an innocent pleasure in seeing one’s own legs browned by the sun.” 

No doubt as children we were carefree, and regardless of what we wore, our childhood memories are some of the most beautiful memories that we all carry throughout our lives. But as a young woman myself; I wonder how many of us now as grown up Indian women miss our childhood frock, and consider being modestly dressed as a restriction?? And desire to be free – running and jumping around in a mini skirt?? 

This article has truly messed with my brain, and I simply can’t make sense out of her statements…her reference to Mary Quant’s belief that “VULGARITY IS LIFE ”…!! And her own so-called ‘highly fashionable’ idea that lessening and lessening the length of the skirt has brought about “freedom and economic independence and autonomy over one’s own body”.

12th Boards for the batch that didn’t give it in 10th 

This is our country’s EXTRAORDINARY  batch that had “no boards in 10th” lockdown ke beech, online paas hone waale students. They don’t know how to stick stickers of ‘barcode and hologram’ but they know everything about snapchat and Instagram!! As they had given their 10th board exam ONLINE in the comfort of their home…

But this time, they have to leave home and go to their respective exam Centers; we only hope, that they’ll remember to take their- hall-ticket, pen-pencil case and exam board, and not wait for exam link, whatsapp notification or zoom meeting joining code!! 

That year (2020-2021)10th percentage of many students, na jaane kaise itna khaas tha?? Kyunki uss saal toh students ka reading-writing main jara bhi practice nahi tha !! 

I wonder how it would be if they had to write a note to the authorities of the 12th board requesting them to excuse their spelling mistakes? …it would probably look something like this : 

“Deer Madm/Sur pls giv me som grass with my spillings in boad exemption, as i gav full concession in studz even tho my eyes are not working poply due to  full 2 ears of using googly. Pls under scam my feers  or when result com my pairants, will be ghastly fascinated and I will be teers.

(“Dear Madam/Sir please give me some grace with my spellings in the board examination as I gave my full concentration in studies, even though I’m having eye problems due to the usage of mobile during the 2 years of lockdown. Please understand my fears or, when results come my parents will be greatly frustrated and I will be in tears.”)

Nevertheless, wishing all of you, and my younger brother Roshan, all the very best for your 12th Boards. 

21st February se boards hain, no doubt sar pe syllabus ka load hain. This time there is no “click and submit option”. You’ll have to take a supplement, says your portion!! Time pe reaching, seat no. list main upar se neeche searching.. be well-prepared, but don’t be scared, before you even know your result will be declared!! And there’s no doubt that at the end you’ll make us all proud.

12th Board Exams and Valentine’s Day!!

My dearest 12th Standard students- your Boards are just in a few days, and tomorrow is yet  another one of those HOPELESS most awaited FAVORITE days of yours; – Valentine’s Day

How much of your BRAIN and recharge can you waste on talking to your classmates Dolly and Molly, and roaming around celebrating Valentine’s Day every day?? There are other DAYS and MOMENTS you should be celebrating in your life as well.

For example, when was the last time you said ‘THANK YOU’ to your Mummy and Daddy, for their blessing and gift? Or told your Granny, aaj mandir tak main Aapko dunga lift? 

Dairy Milk asks you, “HOW FAR will YOU go for LOVE??” I’m quite sure – you’ll go far enough to send your parents to the hospital BED!! With all of that  Dairy Milk’s ‘heart-popping OUT’ of the chocolate in your HEAD!!!

Arey bacho, sharam karo- Bhagwan aur Maa-Baap se daaro! YOU are only 12th ke bache- With no degree, no naukri, future ke plans are KACHE;

So please bacho- sahi kaam main dikhao apni hoshiyari, TOMORROW sit at your desk and Board exam ke liye pure lagan aur mehnat se karo tayari!

Ladies and the discount Sales:

What’s even more interesting than these  discount sales in themselves,  is to see how YOU, ME, TINA, MEENA and DIANA, who are otherwise quite civilized – looking;  become into  junglee hyenas!! (yes ladies, all of us equally … none of us are dudh ka dhula, once the discount sales are khula!!) : “Gate khulne se pehle tayar, hum ready hote hain bahar; : with the same aim in mind ;- FAST and FURIOUS  to be FIRST and FOREMOST to grab all that’s possibly there :uchal – khud ke, chalang laga ke in one go; to scoop up all  the cosmetics, dresses, heels and  jewelry.

And ofcourse,  with the same irresistible thought of “what ALL  we’ll get for FREE;  how big would be the branded saman ka HEAP?? Pura truck bhar ke lenge since things will be CHEAP”!!

You know, Ladies…. even the  devil himself  might  actually end up making way for us; if he ever happens to  see  the toofani andaaz  in which we ENTER the discount site! Like bulldozers raking our way through, nearly unhinging  the gate or the door, and ukhado – fying  the tiles from the FLOOR!!  ‘Girte, padhte, marte,  sabko  dhakka- mukka de ke ; baaju karte…Baap re baap…  when it comes to discount sales, hum Ladies – log  kisi ke baap se nahi darte!

Bollywood Baba Ranveer Singh’s photo with his INVISIBLE new clothes!

We are all familiar with Baba’s HATKE  extravagant  dressing sense : kabhi rang birangi chamkila shirt…toh kabhi dheela- dhala skirt.  But what kind of fashion sense is this, Baba? posing looking so outrageously ‘behaal’ and showing us your whole body and khaal..You see, even our aadi – manav ancestors during prachin kaal did not cause this kind of LAFDA  and made sure they had something like phul- patti, ghas – phus or animal skin as KAPDA. 

But there is also a lot of ADMIRATION and APPRECIATION for this Baba’s very same  ‘BINAKAPDA’ wala pose,!!  – and this is what caught my attention, I was like, “baap rey, how  are these people  able to see and NOTICE something so extraordinarily different in  this photo? And how come I can’t? I thought to myself  “that way, I may not be all that smart but, thoda – bahut art ki samaj toh even I have” ..So I tried again, but this time – chashma laga ke, nazar gadake; ..I stared and glared in the hope; that I too might see what makes this UNATTIRED’ photograph so SPECTACULAR! But unfortunately I must admit; there must be in it –  some jabardast  ‘kala pradarshan’ samajhne ki highly superior intelligence, wali baat.” For I could STILL not NOTICE  anything apart from what is OBVIOUS, that is – photo mein, “ek  DARING BANDA hain, LEKIN pura NANGA hain!!”

Fast and furious : Online food delivery and it’s followers

Sunday ho ya Monday, roz khao  ande…. that’s old – fashioned. Here’s  the modern nuske and funde!! Sunday ho ya  Monday, chatpata, masaledaar; food  is just a click away.  Super – fast order online, RIGHT NOW  and feast on  garma – garam muh main paani laane wala lazeez, swaadisht  khatta  meetha  thikka .. combo main ya single – one day ho ya full week, jab, jitna aur jitney baar ho mann! Sandwich, burger, maska – bun,  ANYTIME, ANYWHERE  eating  ALL the TIME  is so  fun!! Earlier it was, “home delivery , safety  ke naam pe ( during lockdown)” now it’s  din ho ya raat,  “ jamm ke khao – online offers ke daam pe”. ..  aur phir  pade raho sofa pe; bina  kisi kaam ke!!  

Mere  online food  ke andhe premiyo aur deewano,  Bhaiyo, Behno, School ke bacho, College ke  macho,  chote chote  employees and bade bade CEO… ab  online  food  is our preference rozana,  for us;  ghar ka khana is  ‘uncool’ and purana : cause we’re the ‘technology main full – on, health main full – gone’ FOOLISH  NAYA  zamana!!

Hum ladkiyo ki Aage ki padhai, and the recurring khayal of Single Reh jaane ka sawal !!

We girls, our further studies and the slight gloom hanging over our heads
of “missing out on a probable groom” !!

Humare Mohale ke Chikni – chupdi Chachiyo ki paltan, ne mujhse kaha : – ” Arey Chhori!! itna mat padho ki single hi reh jaoge!!’Toh maine bhi, unko kaha : ” aap apna dekho aur zarra chai – pakoda ke aage sochna seekho varna – good morning ke guldaste bhej bhej ke sabko satate reh jaoge”But Yes!! We beautiful, young and undoubtedly intelligent girls; do – every now and then get affected by the “ending up remaining single factor” and we often have this crazy conversation and doubt about our further Education.We think ” yaar jab tak humara PhD complete ho jayega… “We’ll be like gone-with-the wind; murjhaya hua flowers “without makeup or GEHNA”-And by then all the handsome HUNKS will have chosen the other girls, and call us their “pyari BEHNA”!!We imagine ourselves as “muh main kum daant, walking stick, jhuriyo and gol frame wale chashmo ke sath” Becoming a FOSSIL at the study table- “Kitabo ke dher main” while other girls roam around with lipstick, Kajal, high Heels style bikher bikher ke!!

Of course- that’s just our imagination…But dear girls, let me tell you : by then we’ll be: strong Women; intellectual, professional, and well- read an edge above the rest…!! When intelligence dresses itself with confidence : Sabki -“Pairo talle zameen khisak jayegi !!Chakra jayenge, takra jayenge, Gir, padh ke collide and collapse ho jayenge!! Slip aur, skid ho jayenge ….!Phighal ke liquid ho jayenge”Even if we just pass by, SIDE se -Samjo dill – o – dimag se completely ghayal ho jayenge- Itne highly Educated Ladki ke SIGHT se!!

Pandemic  padh  gaya  bhaari, one more year wearing mask is jaari!!

Welcome to yet another year – of living:

“MASK” ke peeche se,

Shopping, shutter ke neeche se –

And if police coming from AAGE;

Na jaane hum main se kitney – toh dukaan waale ko hii, leke bhaage!!

Mask pehen ke,  baat karte hain ese – Baap – re – baap !! maano, hum sab hain ‘paan khao thukdu jaise’ !! Maine kaha, Chachi ; mujhe lagi hain bhuk, signal pe  Kuch khilaoge?? Chaachi ne  suna:, mujhe hain single hone ka duk!! Meri shaadi kab karaoge???

While eating and drinking – We often forget…..that there’s a  ‘rumali roti’  like kapda – between the pakoda and our mouth! And, kids   have chewed on  it like chewing gum, others – have  chabaod   it  along with their  subji … And yet  there are THOSE who’ve been EXTRA innovative  and – used it as an ‘INSTANT” FILTER while drinking water!!

So dear friends…  with all  of this ’muh’ – ka – baandi and ‘naakabandhi’ continuing…: – this  year; “bada bada” unrealistic goals nai rakhne ka, One fine day “wala pahad ukhaadne” ka soch nai rakne ka, itna sabr rakne ka – Ki  everyday life main shiddat se kaam karne ka …..’Life’s NOT about : Running ‘ghode’ jaise koi RACE –  It’s the DAILY things that with COURAGE you have to face!! Better than “full speed pe BREAKDOWN” is maintaining a consistent everyday PACE!!’

The Ordering  Disorder!!

These are the; COMMANDING and DEMANDING :  riotous type of people WHO simply cannot  do anything on their own: or go anywhere without creating – a RUCKUS and treating others like animals from a CIRCUS!! ..‘do this , do that, this way – that  way, … faster properly !!.. karke logon ka sarr chabaa  jaate hain!!

These finicky – panicky sophisticated, bheja eaters !! want everything done in a frightfully RIGID, unrealistically,  ‘PERFECT’ manner and will go on ORDERING –  and chewing up your brain for the most INSIGNIFICANT  thing!!!..  till they’re gasping for BREATH!!! But – baap – rey  baap!! –  they shall not give up on being the “MALIK” ….who gives everyone HUKKUM  and scares everyone to DEATH!!

My  ‘Hindi’  dakhalandazi,  in pure ‘Angrezi’!!!

My  Dearest  readers, thank   you so much for reading my blog;  and  graciously  putting up with me – although  I have been  making  Khichdi out of the  English language!! I’m one of those Literature students who was actually thrown out of the kingdom of Literature; fell off the tree of Linguistics,. and was rejected by a board of  scoffing, nearly choking and  coughing, English Professors, who CHASED me out of town with a BROOM !!: …Cursing my khandaan from maasi to buaa; Giving one after the other  English mein  bad’duaa…!!!’  and yet : I chose to come back – and show my face – and even try a HAND AT WRITING!!!

So,  you see, I just don’t have what it takes : to be  an English writer like everyone else … my WRITINGS  lack  that ‘SHAKESPEARE – IC’ “thee, thy, thou, thine”  wala  Angrezi touch …My pronunciation and diction have  some sort of an issue – for me, it’s easier to write “arey, jaa re .. yeh puniya ka kaam kar ke, aa.. re !!” rather than, ” I hereby ordain unto thee, to perform this noble task”

If , any  English writers;  narrated  a  story  about “the fights  between two wives of a gentleman; ”, they  would certainly  bring together the most polished of words to adorn the title of the story; LIKE : “The miseries of the 2 wives” Or “The fable of the 2 Wives who fought throughout their  lives ” Or maybe “The two  quarreling  wives ”…. But  my title for the same would be….“Sautan Lagaye Aag, Jaan Bacha ke Bhaag”!!